This series on ethnicity and 2e takes a closer look at how twice-exceptionality intersects with ethnic stereotypes, often adding another layer of “difference” to students.
What does it mean to be an Asian American? Asia, with 17 million square miles, includes over four billion people in 48 countries, speaking more than 2,300 languages. In other words, there is plenty of diversity.
Perhaps the biggest thing Asian Americans have in common with one another is mainstream American prejudices about who they are.
In a recent University of Iowa study, “Nothing Fits Exactly: Experiences of Asian American Parents of Twice-Exceptional Children,” Soeun Park found that societal expectations, sometimes influenced by stereotypes, “may complicate the experiences of Asian American parents who have twice-exceptional children.”
From her dorm room in the University of Pennsylvania, where she is finishing her doctorate in psychology, Park tries to unravel some of the tired stereotypes about Asian American 2e students.
“This study was a learning experience for me,” she says. “I grew up in South Korea and as an Asian person, I can say that we, too, internalize some of these stereotypes.”
The trope of the Tiger Parent, inadvertently popularized by Amy Chua’s ironic 2011 book,
Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, doesn’t really show up in Park’s study — or in many others — except as an oversimplification.
“When you Google ‘Asian American parents,’ you get ‘Tiger Moms,’” Park says with a laugh, explaining the stereotype of strict, harsh parents who want their children to get all A’s. “Of course, that is not possible or practical for everybody. The ‘Tiger Mom’ doesn’t exist in reality.”
What does exist within the few studies done of 2e and Asian Americans are parents less attached to old-world, authoritarian concepts of parenthood and more interested in, as Park says, “flexibility and constructing their parenting practice” according to their children’s exceptionalities.
“The parents that I met were relieved when they learned about 2e. They didn’t have a negative reaction,” Park says, referring to the 2018 report co-authored by Dr. Megan Foley-Nicpon. “They wanted to know what was going on and that they were not the only parents in the world who have this type of kid.
“Identifying their child as 2e was more of a normalization, just as it would be for any parent,” Park says.
The complication with 2e comes from students standing at a double crossroads. They are pulled between their gifts and learning challenges, as well as their Asian and American identities. This may add additional preconceptions that magnify a student’s understanding of their own twice-exceptionality.
[perfectpullquote align=”left” bordertop=”false” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]Identifying their child as 2e was more of a normalization, just as it would be for any parent.[/perfectpullquote]
“In general,” Park says, “being seen as a ‘forever foreigner’ is a concern in the Asian American community. It’s a day-to-day life stereotype. For example, almost every day people will say to me, ‘Where are you from?’ I say, ‘California.’ They say, ‘Where are you really from?’”
Park explains that Asian Americans consider themselves a racial minority in the U.S., but when schools talk about racial minorities, sometimes Asian Americans are not discussed.
“We are invisible in many ways,” she says. “When that intersects with 2e, it also contends with another prevailing stereotype of being a ‘model minority.’ The idea, for example, that Asians are good at math puts another level of stress on a student.”
Like any other American, Asians who live here long enough fall prey to some of the same biases.
During her research, Park came upon a parent whose son had obvious learning challenges as well as gifts. “After he was identified as 2e,” she says, “most of this mother’s difficulties came from within her family. She struggled to communicate what 2e meant to her family members, who, though American, had perspectives about parenting that were more stereotypically Asian.
“Her mother wanted her to raise her son in a stricter way. Some of her siblings thought more physical punishment would work to stop the son’s destructive behaviors, often caused by his undiagnosed exceptionalities. Coming from that family culture, mitigating the differences between Asian and American ideas of child raising was definitely a struggle for this mother.”
Another parent in the report said, “I’m not Asian. I’m not American. I’m Asian American. What does that mean?”
As far as the study goes, most of the parents in Park’s reporting were tireless advocates for their children, seeking to find an accurate diagnosis, and supporting and championing their “complicated” kids.
Park concluded that there is a need to “demystify certain images of Asian American parents — often negatively biased — and to embrace the universality of twice-exceptionality beyond races and ethnicities.”
[perfectpullquote align=”right” bordertop=”false” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]I’m not Asian. I’m not American. I’m Asian American. What does that mean?[/perfectpullquote]
Resisting cultural stereotypes, an Asian American parent in Park’s study gave her 2e kids advice that wouldn’t be expected by those who understand Asian Americans through a popular cultural lens. She said, “choose what comes naturally to you, do what gives you the most satisfaction and enjoyment. Don’t be in a stereotypical career or don’t study something that you’re not going to like the rest of your life just because it’s going to give you money.”
In addition to advocating for their children who are both gifted and learning challenged, Asian American parents of 2e students often have to step out of the “model minority” and “Tiger Parent” stereotypes, she said.
“I’m happy,” Park says, “that my study was able to debunk that mysterious and mythic image of Asian American parents of 2e students.”
