I first learned that I would be a new father in the spring of 1997. I was elated at the time, not knowing what the future had in store for us, a young couple in our late 20s. Little did I know that this child, and the two to follow, would take us along a very different path.
Our son, Sean, born in the winter of 1998, was not what we expected. He didn’t do all the typical baby things. In fact, it wasn’t long before we had to throw out the baby bible of the time, What to Expect When You’re Expecting, as it was irrelevant. Sean didn’t nap very often, was hyper alert, hyper sensitive, and, quite honestly, hyper everything. As it turns out, Sean was also twice-exceptional — extremely smart, but also a boy with a high-functioning autism. Our life trajectory changed instantaneously.
Now, a little more than 20 years on, we look back and marvel that we actually made it through the challenges we encountered. To be sure, the path was never easy. A few years following Sean’s birth, we had two other children — and yes, both were twice-exceptional. It is through this journey, alongside my career as a teacher, administrator, consultant, author, and now executive director of SENG (Supporting the Emotional Needs of Gifted), that I have become well aware of the difficult yet rewarding journey that all parents of twice-exceptional children experience. I am intimately familiar with the ups and downs, the challenges, the endless advocacy, the stress and anxiety, and, of course, the joy of watching these kids grow in such unique ways. It is this experience in raising and teaching gifted and twice-exceptional children that I hope to bring to this column on a regular basis.
As I mentioned, I am currently the operational head of SENG, a non-profit organization dedicated to social and emotional development of both gifted and twice-exceptional individuals across the life span. The importance of this organization cannot be understated. Due to atypical neurodevelopment, some gifted and twice-exceptional children, teens, and adults have delayed or stunted growth of the limbic system, which is the part of the brain responsible for regulation, language development, executive functioning, and other cognitive skills. When combined with an intense sensory input valve, which is responsible for learning through sensory intake, those who are gifted and twice-exceptional can develop deep, intense memories through varied experiences while struggling to build the capacity to control the associated feelings.
[perfectpullquote align=”right” bordertop=”false” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]Those who are gifted and twice-exceptional can develop deep, intense memories through varied experiences while struggling to build the capacity to control the associated feelings.[/perfectpullquote]
As a result, development of social and emotional skills can be delayed. It is therefore of vast importance that we teach these skills in order to lay a foundation for academic and social success as students strive for self-understanding and productivity. We all know that our kids tend to struggle in social situations (school, community events, etc.) and can feel isolated. We also know that they are more susceptible to existential depression when they discover that the world does not understand them. This discovery can lead to anxiety, stress, and a number of other emotional issues.
It is within this context that SENG plays an important role in providing resources and training to teachers, parents, and professionals to enable them to build and support gifted and 2e individuals’ social-emotional foundations over the course of their lives. In the process of raising three 2e children, my family often turned to SENG to guide us along that difficult expedition, and in my role as SENG’s executive director, I hope to provide the same support for you and your community.
In these columns I will tackle issues unique to the twice-exceptional. These might include atypical neurodevelopment, fatigue and the twice-exceptional student, coping with stress/anxiety, appropriate educational environments for a 2e child, twice-exceptionality in adulthood, and more. I look forward to sharing my experiences and insights.
